The Dexter Leader
A Heritage Newspaper
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Fund-raiser boosts kids' support
PUBLISHED: April 5, 2007
Children and parents grieving the loss of a loved one soon will have a place to turn to express their feelings and heal their hearts with the formation of an Ele's Place in Washtenaw County.
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A fund-raising breakfast attended by about 350 people, billed as the Healing Hearts Society, took place March 20 at Weber's Inn in Ann Arbor.
Donors were treated to a light breakfast along with emotionally charged testimonials from children and adults who have been helped by the program.
The original Ele's Place was founded in Lansing in 1991, but the drive to establish a local chapter began in earnest about a year ago thanks largely to the efforts of Sheila Morrison Patrias.
She discovered Ele's Place a few years after the death of her husband, former Manchester High School Principal Rod Morrison, in 1991.
At the time, Morrison Patrias lived in the Jackson area and was making the trip to Lansing several times a week with her two daughters, then 2 and 4 years old.
Like many children who have lost a parent, the girls lacked the coping skills to be able express their suffering, and that spilled over into other areas of the family's life.
"Rod Morrison was the dad who would snuggle with his daughters," Patrias told the group.
"After he died, I was angry that his daughters would never grow up knowing him, and fearful of what that would mean."
She remarried and moved to Chelsea with Stacia and Leah, but the desire to establish in this area a similar group dedicated to healing grief never diminished.
As chairwoman of the Founder's Council, Patrias addressed the breakfast gathering with good news.
"We have found a place," she said. "Scio Community Church and United Bank & Trust have donated space for two to three years."
Both are located on Zeeb Road, on opposite sides of Interstate 94 in Scio Township.
"It's nice that they're right down the road from each other," Patria said.
The church has the classroom space necessary to hold the age-appropriate discussion and support groups, and the bank has the administrative office space.
Laurie Baumer, executive director of Ele's Place in Lansing, has been tapped to serve the same role for the Washtenaw County office.
"I have been honored to share in the grief journeys of these children," she said.
"All too often they keep it inside because they don't know what to do with these strong feelings."
With the facilities, about 60 volunteers and a director in place, the next step is to secure a nest egg that will see the fledgling organization through until it is established.
"We'd like to be able to raise $200,000 in our first year, and that would allow us some stability until we really get going," Baumer said.
Toward that end, the fund-raising campaign offered donors a variety of levels of giving, and every dollar raised will go directly to Ele's Place programs for grieving children, she noted.
"Ele's Place is essential — unresolved grief may show itself in nightmares, bedwetting, violence and suicidal tendencies," she said. "They learn how to cope and they begin to heal."
Each place setting at each table included cards printed with some of the poignant thoughts and wisdom of the more than 200 children whom Ele's Place has served.
A girl, 4: "Mommy says daddy watches over me now."
A boy, 7 years old: "My tears get stuck inside of me but sometimes they sneak out."
A girl, 8: "Am I still a big sister?"
Marie Kemner of Manchester brought her children Nathaniel and Grace up to the podium with her to tell of their need for a local Ele's Place since her husband, Eric Kemner, was killed in a July 2005 traffic crash.
"Nathaniel lives in constant fear of what would happen if something were to happen to me," Kemner said. "He was having recurrent nightmares that I would drive off and leave him but that he couldn't catch up to me. When he finally told me one day that he often tried to kill himself in his dreams just so he could wake up or go to heaven, I knew we needed help."
She said she was able to enroll Nathaniel in a program through a local hospice but it was only an eight-week session.
"It just wasn't long enough, and Grace couldn't attend in a group because they didn't offer groups for children her age," Kemner added.
In his position as principal of Chelsea High School, Ron Mead is intimately familiar with the difficulties young people face when confronted with loss, which is why he also is a member of the Founder's Council.
"I've been through the deaths of students and parents myself," he said. "We estimate there are 20 to 25 students in my school dealing with the loss of a loved one at any given time, and we extended that to be about 1,000 kids throughout the county."
Mead said the Founder's Council receives a lot of calls from Jackson and Livingston counties, and that there is a substantial waiting list for Ele's Place in Lansing.
Mead also shared his personal brush with tragedy, and had fate not intervened, his family could easily have the need for Ele's Place services.
"After the school shooting in 1993 in which the superintendent (Joe Piasecki) lost his life, I was injured but I healed," he said.
"My two daughters could easily be left grieving the loss of their father."
Mead said the Healing Heart Society will ensure the future of the organization, and asked for five-year pledges of varying amounts.
"A pledge of $1,000 a year for five years would support two children through the program; $5,000 a year for five years would fund one entire children's support group; and for those who are able, $10,000 a year for five years would fund a children's group and expand Ele's Place outreach efforts," Mead said, and also left open the option for people to make a financial gift of any amount for any length of time.
"This is truly an investment in our futures," he said. "It's the most important investment we can make."
Chelsea City Council member Jason Lindauer had very personal reasons to support Ele's Place.
"This is long overdue," he said following the presentation. "I lost a sister myself a long time ago, and my 9-year-old son is struggling with the loss of one of his close friends.
"This represents a commitment the county is making to future generations."
Baumer said Monday that due to the presentation, many donors stepped up to support the organization.
"We now have funds raised and can begin programming on April 30," she said, but noted that continued contributions are needed and welcomed.
A list of volunteer positions and supplies still needed is posted at www.elesplace.org.
Those interested in being volunteers or donors, or enrolling in Ele's Place services, can call (734) 929-6640.
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