The Dexter Leader
A Heritage Newspaper
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The wives club
Role of 'farm spouses' evolves to confront economic necessity
By Edward Freundl, Staff Writer
PUBLISHED: January 31, 2008
More often than not, modern economic realities dictate that they take a job off the farm so their husbands can continue to farm.
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Carol and Sue Huehl are equal partners in the family farm with their husbands, Denny and Jerry Huehl, but both had to find full-time work away from the farm in order to raise their families.
"It's hard to be a full-fledged, stay-at-home 'farm wife' anymore," said Carol, who is married to Denny. "We really need the benefits through work."
Carol Huehl works at the Michigan Educational Credit Union on Jackson Road, and she also is a member of the Freedom Township Planning Commission.
"It was my dream that I could stay at home and help on the farm, but the way the economy went and with the insurance, I had to get a job," Carol said.
Her sister-in-law agreed.
"There aren't many wives that don't work at least part-time; it's really for the insurance," Sue said.
Sue is a registered nurse, but her main task is in quality improvement in the trauma program at St. Joseph Mercy Hospital.
It's no secret that farming is hard work, but the women work just as hard and just as long as the men in order to keep the farm going.
"We do all the work a husband would normally do around the house — the lawn, the garden, the painting — to allow them to do things to take care of the farm," said Sue. "It's nice that we have each other to help out."
But all that time spent working comes at a cost.
"I know it's a lot of long hours from their standpoint, but there's not a lot of together time," Carol said. "We have to make up for it in the off-season."
Even so, a large dairy operation like Huehl Acres doesn't allow for much of an off-season.
"It seems like it was easier when we first got married, but back then we didn't have the seed business, and didn't have the heated workshop," Sue said.
"It doesn't seem like there's a lot of down time anymore, especially with the livestock.
"It would probably be easier if we just grew crops."
Married to the farm
Carol married the older Huehl brother, Denny, in 1979. Sue and Jerry were married the following year.
A set of fortunate circumstances allowed Carol and Denny to move into the house just next door to the north of the main farm.
"When this place came available, Huehl Acres bought it from Chuck and Peggy Buxton, but it was originally known as the Alfred Kuhl Farm," Carol recalled.
"There were a couple of other possibilities, but we bought this place a couple months before getting married."
The timing couldn't have worked out better, Sue noted.
"We could have ended up five or 10 miles apart," she said.
Carol and Denny have three children: Stephanie, Thomas and Nicholas; Sue and Jerry's children are Kate and Robert.
Because of their proximity, each woman helped raise the other's kids.
Their husbands' schedules took a toll on the kids, too.
Even ordinary things like a long weekend away or a family vacation has to be carefully choreographed.
"When the kids were little (Sue and I) did a lot of the parenting, but we understood (the mens') responsibilities," Carol said.
"It was hard for the kids; they'd see other kids' parents at school events but you could count on your hands the number of things Denny went to.
"It takes a lot of understanding to do what we do," she added.
Then and now
Carol grew up on South Union Street in Grass Lake near the old athletic fields, and her father inherited a farm from his father on Norvell Road.
"Our home in the village burned in 1976 so we moved out to the farm," Carol said.
She compared what life on the farm was like, and how it's changed in a relatively short period of time.
"Farming's a lot different from when I grew up," she said.
"You have to have more knowledge of how to raise crops, of the equipment and technology.
"You used to have family involved more, you didn't have to hire outside help."
Sue has also seen how the business of farming has become more complex.
"You need to have a lot of certifications now, and you're driven by a lot of regulations."
Although Carol grew up on a farm, Sue's family was a couple of generations removed from the land before relocating here.
"I came from Livonia, then my parents bought 20 acres on the other side of the farm (south on Fletcher Road)," she said.
"It was kind of a culture shock, but it was OK. We really liked it - I came from a family who liked to camp."
Although her grandparents had a farm, Sue was completely unfamiliar with a ritual of the rural lifestyle.
"We'd never been to a fair; we didn't even know what one was," she said.
These days both Huehl families are deeply involved in the Chelsea Community Fair and others in the region.
"The fair is a good place to bring city and farm together; it's an educational thing, too," Carol said.
Looking to the future
The habits learned in an entire lifetime working virtually seven days a week, from before sunup to long past sundown, don't just go away when you apply for Social Security.
Both women said the Huehl brothers are not the retirement type, and that's OK with them. They are proud of what their husbands have built, and the work ethic it has instilled in their children.
"His idea of retirement is just tweaking what he does now," said Sue.
"It really gives you a sense of commitment. People know you know the value of the day and you know what hard work is."
Carol said farming is in their blood; it's not something you can just turn off when you're done.
"I'm married to a farmer, we're not going to retire; that's how we were raised," Carol said.
"Their hearts are in farming - it's what they love to do."
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